Dear Otherwise Sane and Savvy People,
Why do you put clothes on your dogs? It's not cute. It's creepy.
Dogs do not care about clothes. They have practically no fashion sense. What they DO have, however, is a head-to-toe fur coat that is NOT meant to be covered up by a Schnauzer-sized, beaded, ripped up, off-the-shoulder Flashdance t-shirt with four matching ballet slippers.
This is wrong. Very wrong. It's the equivalent of us humans wearing fur coats as underwear.
Dogs are not naked. Not ever. They do not need clothing. They have no awareness of their "nudity," nor do they care.
Ever seen a dog lift his leg to pee on...well...just about any stationary object, with his goods hanging out for everyone within eye-shot to see? Of COURSE you have! Did he seem embarrassed that you saw him that way? Of COURSE he didn't! Any creature who will get his jollies on your leg, poop in your front yard, then come inside and lick himself clean at your feet while you try to eat your dinner is not the least bit concerned with modesty or societal expectations. Promise.
So, to you wonderful and perhaps slightly off balance ladies (or homosexual men) who love your pets: If you REALLY love them, please stop embarrassing them--and your poor husbands (or life partners) who are forced to parade them around the neighborhood on a diamond studded leash--by making them wear tutus and tiaras.
So, to you wonderful and perhaps slightly off balance ladies (or homosexual men) who love your pets: If you REALLY love them, please stop embarrassing them--and your poor husbands (or life partners) who are forced to parade them around the neighborhood on a diamond studded leash--by making them wear tutus and tiaras.
Sincerely,
Proud owner of a perfectly well-adjusted, naked hamster
p.s. Sorry I'm not sorry
5 comments:
Um, LOVE. SERIOUSLY. I about died when a friend posted on Facebook that her dog had some nasty butt problem that required her to smear desitin on it's butt several times a day. To top it off, someone commented that they had touched so many dog butts they had lost count, because in her words she "would do anything for (her) BABIES." BABIES. I will never understand people who treat pets like people. Dressing them up is so beyond my understanding.
True story: An older woman in my neighborhood in southern California would walk her little lap dog down my street. It invariably pooped in my yard, and then she would pull a tissue out of her purse and wipe it's butt, then put that tissue back in her purse. That's one way to keep other people out of your purse.
i just love reading this blog. When will you write a book? I look forward to your realness, side splitting humor and the very joy I find in reading. Keep up the work girl.
Dear "Our Family:" Who ARE you?
I know I'm WAY late to this dance, but I just read it and died laughing because I wrote a blog about this same topic and never posted it. Now I HAVE to post it, you left me no choice! And sorry, I'm not sorry in advance!
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